New Year-New Laws

Along with the more newsworthy laws prohibiting smoking in vehicles transporting children or driving and using a handheld cellphone, legalizing marijuana, and school sports and bathroom access and gender identity here are some other new laws for the New Year.

In Oregon, privately run websites that feature police mug shots must take down photos for free if subjects can show they were not guilty or that charges were dropped. Interestingly enough, I kind of like looking at the local mug shot feature on the local news online, and since my own have never appeared I hadn't given much thought to how a person found not guilty or charged would feel about this.

In Delaware, fisher people beware sale, possession or distribution of shark fins prohibited. This law I mention for my fishing fool young’uns, in case they ever find themselves in Delaware.

In Illinois, you can now return a pet or be reimbursed for veterinary costs if an illness was not disclosed by the seller. So-called "lemon pets" laws already exist in 21 states, according to the American Veterinary Medical Association. As a lemonade lover and animal lover I think lumping disappointing pets and cars together and calling them lemons is offensive.  

In Oregon, new mothers will now be able to take their placentas home from the hospital since some experts say ingesting it has positive health benefits and here I was hoping the mother’s might opt for burying it under a tree or something, anything other than eating it.

Happy New Year, I’m going with black eyed peas and collard greens again.

The Thirsty Monkey

After passing The Thirsty Monkey on Highway 40 (going between Kingsland and St. Marys) numerous times my husband finally turned off the main drag and on to the perimeter road upon which it is located by Kings Bay flowers, the Honda place, and the mostly fried seafood restaurant that has changed names several times and is currently called Ship2Shore for a cup of coffee. I am so happy that he did steer me to The Thirsty Monkey because it has everything a coffee place should have, besides really good coffee any way you like it. They have casual mismatched furnishings with tables and chairs and sofa and chair combos for all kinds of informal get togethers. There’s a raised corner niche (smallish stage area) with microphones for a live band or other events they have scheduled. They also have a bunch of board and card games including Scrabble and Uno, two of my favorites to occupy you while you sip their brew or to occupy the younger set that may be traveling with you. I also perused their nice menu of breakfast and lunch-ish items and some nice sweets that you can look over at their website, thethirstymonkey.com .The next time I drop by I’m going to ask if it is part of a coffee house chain, because it doesn't have that vibe. One more thing (plus the coffee) I particularly liked is the original artworks for sale on one wall. I even know one of the artists that sold one of her paintings there named Haley. She is a talented young artist and horsewoman and told me all about her art displayed at The Thirsty Monkey the other day when I caught up with her at the bowling alley. Needless to say if you are in the area and looking for a nice cup of coffee The Thirsty Monkey is the place to check out. Maybe I’ll see you there.  

The Nut House

Reading about the lady that was arrested for stabbing her common law husband with a ceramic squirrel for not bringing home any beer on Christmas Eve reminded me of the ceramic nut, topped with a ceramic squirrel of course that we used to have before our house fire in 2009. My parents were into buying nuts (still in the shells) as I was growing up around the holidays and I guess that goes with the nutcracker ballet that is always so popular around that time of year too. We always had a few nuts in our stockings. Then there is also a pecan tree in the yard across the street from us and many times (over the past 30 years) we would collect the nuts the real squirrels didn’t get and one year I boxed up a bunch and sent them to my brother and his family in Bolivia. In the return address I just wrote The Nut House and our address. Long after I asked him if he’d ever received the box of pecans and he said he did but he always wondered where the Nut House was that they’d come from. That made me laugh. As for our little ceramic nut and squirrel, it sat by our fireplace quite happily for years and no one was ever stabbed with it, I am happy to report. 

Some Predictable Things

Two things actually, some zoo predators got a chance to take down live prey and they did, and a slippery road made for a slippery spill on a motorcycle.

The first happened when a white tailed deer strayed into the cheetah enclosure at the Smithsonian’s National Zoo. A spokesperson for the zoo called killing the deer, or prey in this instance "a normal and expected reaction" by the carnivorous big cats.  A zookeeper heard noises coming from the cheetah pen and found the deer carcass near a pair of cheetah siblings. I hope the noises were sounds of sibling revelry rather than sibling rivalry and apparently the deer remains will be examined (what’s left of them) to be sure the animal carried no disease. The only witnesses to the chase etc. were the cheetahs themselves. This would have made for an interesting webcam event.

The slippery spill was witnessed by some friends at the bike (non-motorized) shop on the corner in front of which my husband fishtailed his bike coming around a rain slicked corner yesterday. Thankfully other than a scratched up helmet, a little dent to the gas tank, my husband came through mostly unscathed, unless you consider a small injury to his backside, and a little bigger one to his pride. Needless to say after he got the bike back up, with the help of our friends at the Camden Bicycle Center who were also nice enough to follow him home to make sure he made it here, he is now resting his injured parts on a heating pad and the bike is resting in the garage. 

Catching Fire

Not the movie, part two of the Hunger Game trilogy, although that might be an interesting blog at some point, this is about other things catching fire. A shed on the old Gilman Paper Mill site caught fire last night. I noticed several bonfires of varying sizes and sophistication (some on the ground and others in outdoor chimney pots and fire pits) while I was out and about on Christmas Eve looking at lights. We have had some chilly nights here in South Georgia and I have recently noticed a couple of homeless people here too. I am not talking about the scammer types that I've seen holding signs at various strategic intersections (Exit 1 and the outer reaches of Walmart’s parking lot) but people that look seriously confused, distressed and dirty, talking to themselves or driving a bike or shopping cart loaded down with a mish mash of worldly possessions. There are plenty of patches of deep woods and abandoned places like the shed on the old mill site to hide out in around here. If homeless people are considered an urban blight maybe we aren't so urban as to have no choice but see them, but I have seen people cross the street to avoid crossing their paths. I've also taken note of lots of overflowing trash cans along the post-holiday roads, my own included. The garbage collectors were a day off in their schedule, because of a day off for Christmas, I am guessing. In a place where there were so many wrappings and so much waste to cast off, and the holidays essentially behind us, perhaps we can still find compassion for those that found no room at the inn, and are still needing shelter, warmth, and sustenance. 

Windshield Wipers

Windshield wipers are the kinds of things you don’t give much thought to until they stop working, or worse begin making the fingernails on the chalkboard sounds. Mine are okay but I was reading about windshield wipers and found out that they were invented by a woman named Mary Anderson in 1903, just 2 years before my late father-in-law was born. A lot of things changed over the period of his long lifetime but windshield wipers, not so much. Today there is a system being developed (originally for fighter jets) that that can clear moisture and other material from a windshield by using high-frequency sound waves. A transducer attached to the windshield sends high frequency ultrasound across the surface that repels rain, snow, ice, or insects, and even bird droppings. Along with the benefit of better visibility this system improves aerodynamics which directly affects fuel efficiency by reducing drag. The only thing I didn’t see mentioned about this new system was the price tag, but I did get a price on new wipers, blades and arms for my husband’s Honda and it was enough to raise my eyebrows and lower my bank balance. That’s the kind of drag I’m talking about. 

Return of the Count Down-12 Days of Christmas

Come (shop) they told me, pa rum pum pum pum…well the song does mention a gift just not the kind you can order from Amazon.com. As stores try to drum up business, I am trying not to get snared into the maddening crowd of last minute shoppers. I’m downsizing the Christmas celebration (and tree and decorations) in St. Marys this year but not the reason for celebrating. Julie still loves my springy Santa hat and I am still crocheting. Homemade ravioli and family still dominate the day.

Count Down-11 Days ‘til Christmas

Okay I realize my hope for a white Christmas in South Georgia is just a pipe dream but still I figured I would use my blog to pipe up about the white stuff (snow). It is one of the forces of nature that makes Christmas, well Christmas-y. I also realize that my countdown is off and if I continue to pipe up on the 12 days of Christmas, one day at a time, I won’t finish till after Christmas, because today is the 15th and 25-15=10 (not 11). So now I am considering combining the Lords and Ladies or some of the birds closer to the end of the countdown (or the beginning of the song), but I’ll try not to confuse myself and end this train of thought. I am chalking this business with the countdown being off up to bad planning on my part. In truth though I do live a large part of my life in the state of confusion I’m mostly pretty good at planning and I love the Christmas season because it is a wonderful time to get family together and I have come to realize what a gift that really is.

Lordy, Lordy, the Christmas Countdown Continues!

This morning I made one of my infamous lists of blog topics to cover today and all the rest of the days until Christmas and I discovered that I do not have to combine the Lords a Leaping with Ladies Dancing after all. I am happy to say my countdown is back on track since I made this list, and I am no longer leaping to conclusions. Did you know that this year like all Presidential Election years is a leap year?

Other than the 10 Lords a Leaping, the only other leaper here is our dog, Fred. He leaps up at the trunks of the pine trees in our back yard in an attempt to snare any of the squirrels that so nimbly make their getaways up the same pine tree trunks and then perch on a branch above and scold him for trying. Maybe if Fred didn’t have to leapfrog over a half a dozen chickens he’d be fast enough to catch one of the squirrels. All I know is that Fred is persistent. He keeps trying. Fred is a rat terrier-chihuahua mix (hails from the local Wal-Mart barking lot) and when he’s not leaping around the back yard he has been known to get extra practice by leaping onto our dining room table when you leave the room to sample any part of your breakfast you may have left unattended. I wouldn’t mind it so much if he would just put a few correct numbers on the Sudoku for me. It would be great to come back from the bathroom and find that Fred had given me some help on that. But alas, no joy and I didn’t really need the extra biscuit anyway. At least Fred doesn’t drink coffee. Some mornings really do require a leap of faith (Sunday’s, in particular).

There’s just one more thing that keeps leaping out at me, I am still not done with my Christmas shopping. Leaping lizards! Where is Daddy Warbucks (aka Poppa) when I need him!

9 Ladies Dancing (Not Dancing with the Stars!)

‘Tis the day for yours truly (me-not your true love) to give you nine ladies dancing and here they are!

•           First Lady (literally and on this list) Michelle Ozumba, I mean Obama! Who better to help me realize my fitness goals which include keeping the holiday pounds at bay?

•           Next is the multitalented Monica Lewinsky doing your choice of the Limbo or pole dancing.

•           Dolly Parton follows doing the Hammer Dance while singing “U Can’t Touch This These”. Do you really think anyone is going to be watching her Hammer harem/parachute pants?

•           Then there’s Tammy Two Step Why Not Wynette dancing while she stands by her man. A list of ladies dancing wouldn’t be complete without some good old country line dancing!

•           And with the latest You Tube sensation, go Lady Ga Ga Gangnam Style. Opp, Opp, Oppan Gangnam Style!

•           You won’t have to turn up your radio or drive a million miles for ev’rybody to have fun tonight and ev’rybody Wang Chung tonight. Just watch Connie (Wang) Chung rip it up, move down, rip it up, move it down to the ground.

•           A list of ladies dancing wouldn’t be complete without Donna Summers, the queen of disco, known for working hard for the money!

•           I’m also including Hillary Clinton, who while fainted while break (your head) dancing and suffered a mild concussion. (Notice the six degrees of separation between her and Monica.)

•           And the last lady dancing on this list is Lorena Bobbit. She isn’t a very good dancer but she just keeps cutting in.

If I skipped anyone you think should have been on my list leave a comment and perhaps your lady will appear on next year’s list of 9 Ladies Dancing!

8 Maids a Milking-The Countdown Keeps Churning!

Dear Santa,

    We are sending you this card to share a little Christmas steer. We know this is your busy time of year and we want you to know that we are pulling for you, especially on the eighth day of Christmas. The other 11 days of Christmas pail in comparison to ours. We herd it through the bo vine that some of your reindeer have been sick so we feel mooo ved to volunteer our cows. We have just the girl to take Rudolf’s place. Nude Jersey lost her hide and has been blushing brightly ever since. We are aware there’s a lot at steak and we don’t want you to worry, all our girls can easily jump over the moon and cattle drive your sleigh filled with gifts on Christmas Eve. This offer is no bull. It’s the veal thing.

                                                            Sincerely,

                                                                   8 Maids

Dear Maids,

   Kinder words were never uddered. Your offer is sincerely appreciated but all of the reindeer have recovered and will be able to fulfill their duties this Christmas Eve. I will however keep your offer in mind and consider it my official plan B for the future.

                                                Thanks and Merry Christmas!

                                                                                         Santa

*Blogger’s Note: I think I have milked this one for all its worth.

7 Swans a Swimming in Sync for Christmas

And so the countdown to Christmas moves “swimmingly” on.

Seven swans were swimming on Swan Lake, so the urban legend goes. The newest member of the flock had started out in life as an ugly duckling but things changed and happy-ever-after-ly she found herself where she finally felt she belonged gliding effortlessly across the lake, gazing contentedly at her reflection and the wavering reflections of her six best friends in the moonlight. Suddenly a shadow passed overhead. The surface of Swan Lake instantly lost its sparkly shimmer and the seven swans’ reflections disappeared. A chill wind etched a new pattern of ripples across the lake’s leaden surface and an unearthly moan could be heard whispering softly through the bare branches of the trees that ringed the lake. Slowly the volume rose in crescendo and the moan went from a windy whisper to a threatening growl and finally to one long soul shivering howl. An eerie silence followed. The seven swans looked mutely at each other. None dared break the silence. It would soon be Christmas Eve and once again the evil one (not Dr. Seuss’ Grinch either) had risen from the underbelly of the usually tranquil Swan Lake determined to spook Santa’s reindeer to throw the jolly old elf off course and extinguish the hope and light of Christmas the way he blotted out the moonlight. The swans just wanted to get the flock out of there. They weren’t ready to sing their swan song. But they knew they had a role to play to counter the evil deeds and put an end to the darkness. With only the sounds of their wings to guide them the seven swans rose gracefully with perfect synchronization in a reverse swan dive. Up they flew until the moonlight broke through the clouds and reflected off their snow white feathers lighting a path for Santa to follow. Once again foiled the evil one sunk back below the surface of Swan Lake, down through the murky depths of despair, to find that even his most evil deeds couldn’t squash the spirit Christmas. A brightly wrapped gift with his name on it waited for him at the entry to his underwater lair.

With the exception of the five golden rings, the rest of this countdown is pretty much for the birds.

6 Geese a Laying, I’m Just Sayin’

On the sixth day of Christmas as a gift, in fact,

Was a gaggle of geese, 6 to be exact.

Amelia and Abigail Gabble of Aristocats’ fame

were laying rubber in the driveway whenever they came

to visit Gwen from Charlotte’s Web who thought she saw a spider,

that made Goosebumps bump her head and spill her apple cider.

So on Goosebumps goose egg Gwen was laying an icepack

as she yelled at the Gabbles, “You should drive on a race track!”

“Time for laying out the feast,” they yelled back in return,

“We want the turkey that keyed our car to fry or burn!”

Soon the Native American goose, Wauna, sniffed, “What smells?”

 After laying an egg, she came walking on egg shells.

“Laying in wait for Christmas?” honked Boris, “I’m just saying.”

On the sixth day of Christmas there were 6 geese a laying!

5 Golden Rings

Six geese a laying five golden rings, even though in the back of my mind I knew geese laid eggs I never questioned them laying rings in this song. Maybe that was because of the goose that laid the golden eggs or nest eggs that made me think of money. It seems like I’m always spending more of that then I actually have at this time of year. As far as six geese laying only five of anything, well as a chicken owner I can tell you that someone usually lays out every day (skips laying an egg, or in this case a golden ring) and I can never figure out which one. Whenever I ask, they just all go to squawking as if they are secretly covering for their unproductive flock member. One can never get a straight answer from a chicken.

Then there are my other favorite golden rings, onion rings. They made an interesting entrée as a 2012 spaghetti night treat, fast food lasagna, layered with quarter pounders, bacon, sloppy Joe meat, cheese, Big Macs, more cheese, and topped with 5 (or more) golden (onion) rings in a really deep pan. Try singing that to the two all beef patties/Mickey Ds jingle! Heart attack holiday fun food and after all as the countdown to Christmas continues, it’s the season for holiday eating too.

4 Calling Birds

There were 4 birds, a chicken, a duck, a crow, and an owl. As calling birds these 4 didn’t exactly fit the bill. But these 4 each found a calling. The chicken was scrambling across the road to go to a Christmas party. The duck followed the chicken but was spotted by a fish and wildlife officer, and unlike his pal the chicken, ran a fowl of the law. After a couple of wise quacks he was allowed to go with a warning. The crow followed in stealth mode and managed to not get caw-t. The owl was trying to keep track of whoo was whoo. Each of them had a gift for the gift exchange and each thought he had outdone the other. All were looking forward to getting rather than giving. Even after they exchanged their gifts they would still be preening and competing for recognition. Then they came across a tern who told them they were going the wrong way. The best Christmas party in the town was in the other direction. The 4 birds took the tern at his word and changed direction toward town. When they arrived at the party there was a long line of children waiting. The chicken, duck, crow, and owl added their gifts to Santa’s pile so there would be enough for all the children. They thanked the tern for showing to them how one good turn calls for another.

As we near the end of the countdown, Christmas day, the four birds found their true calling, learning the joy of giving rather than receiving, and calling for peace on earth and goodwill to all.

3 French Hens

The three French hens in the song The Twelve Days of Christmas are said by some to represent the three virtues: Faith, Hope, and Charity.

“Faith is to believe what you do not see; the reward of this faith is to see what you believe.”

- Saint Augustine

“Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul-and sings the tunes without the words and never stops at all.”                        - Emily Dickinson

“Charity begins at home, but should not end there.”     - Thomas Fuller

“If you haven’t got any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart trouble.”

                                                                - Bob Hope   

Let Faith, Hope and Charity carry us through this Christmas season.

2 Turtle Doves

After resisting the urge to write three recipes (coq au vin, chicken cordon bleu, or chicken chasseur) yesterday, I’ve decided to include this quick microwave turtle recipe for people like me that are scrambling to get things done on Christmas Eve. All you need are small pretzels (knots not sticks), Rolos (the candy), and a nut (pecan half) for the top. Stack the ingredients starting with the pretzel on the bottom and microwave on a microwave safe plate. Serve and watch the tiny turtles disappear.

On the next note the turtle doves mentioned in the song The Twelve Days of Christmas refer to either the pair of birds sacrificed at Mary’s purification or symbols of love and friendship. I prefer the latter especially since Christmas to me is also a time to celebrate love and friendship and a time best spent with friends and loved ones.

The turtle dove is a bird much like the mourning dove commonly found all across the U. S. In my own backyard in St. Marys they frequent the chicken feeder right alongside my chickens (and a brazen squirrel that has managed to stay a step ahead of our dog, Fred). On Andros, the doves large and island small alike love to frequent our bird feeder and they actually line up on the branches of the small ornamental tree (where the feeder is hung) waiting for their turns. There is usually a pair on the ground scouring for dropped seeds too. That’s how they arrive, by twos like the (I’m singing again) two turtle doves and ….tomorrow is Christmas!

On the first day of Christmas

My true love gave to me…

In the manger, a blessed baby…

*Blogger’s note: Merry Christmas-Peace, Love, and Joy to you from my family and me.

Time

Seriously, I am running out of it! This always seems to be the case around the holidays. I was reminded of this issue of time once again when I was chatting with a neighbor this morning in St. Pete. We got on the subject of how time speeds up after you reach a certain age. I can verify that this is true. I have been reading a lot about time and its relationship to space and how different the role of time plays in quantum mechanics versus relativity and suffice to say time as we know for all practical purposes appears to be a device created for and by, you guessed it, human beings. While I have enjoyed reading about quantum mechanics and space-time, I find it isn't easy to explain and not nearly as interesting to other readers as it is to me. Depending on your scientific theory time either is or isn't fundamental but when it comes to the holidays it is fundamental, necessary, and for me, running out. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve after all so my time for working on this blog is up. 

Holiday Travel

Holiday travel has become a little bit more than over the river and through the woods to Grandmother’s house these days. The main thing is to not let it turn into a holiday travel nightmare. Traveling with young children, any children including in my case grandchildren, takes planning. Before even attempting to get on the road I got my car serviced and that is something to consider making an appointment for in advance because my regular place was swamped with people like me making plans for holiday travel. Breaking down on the road is bad enough but when you add kids to the mix you have the ingredients for a travel nightmare, so getting your trusty sleigh, I mean car ready for the trip is important. Packing for me is easy and I like to get the kids involved in packing for themselves too. They are really good about charging up their electronics and bringing various games and chargers. It pays to check the rest of their luggage to make sure they have enough underwear, low priority compared to earbuds. Proof would be that my 13 year old grandson is wearing a couple of swipes of my Secret deodorant today, but at least he packed his toothbrush. Car snacks matter too and I find easy to peel tangerines or other kinds of fruit don’t lead to sugar fatigue and general crankiness. I also like to have a couple of plastic grocery bags along for trash and since our dog is a good traveler and a part of our traveling family, the bags come in handy for his deposits at the rest area. The most important thing to keep in mind about holiday travel is that for the most part it isn't about the journey, with holiday travel it is really all about the destination so, if you, like me, are traveling this holiday season, I wish you safe a trip.

Take Time to De-Stress During the Holidays

This is it, the countdown to the holidays and lots of times in years past I let the stress get the best of me. Yesterday I took time to do something I hadn't done in quite a while and it was just what I needed since I am traveling this weekend and I’ll admit it, the holidays have a way of torquing

 up my stress level. This project wasn't totally time consuming because part of the time I was waiting and watching paint dry. I actually did the usual things I do rather than actually watch the paint dry between the background and the foreground, but sometimes taking a time out to do something you love, for me it would be painting, can be just the right thing to get you back on track. As I worked on this painting I was totally focused on it, shutting out distraction and worry. When I finished the background I was surprised by the passage of time, it didn’t take me long at all. I went back and added the foreground before I went to bed. The picture didn’t come out like I had pictured in my mind’s eye. The colors came out brighter but the process felt great and I like the end result. Now I just hope it looks as good on the wall as it does on the dining room table! 

Cat Conundrum

Cats are just domesticated enough to get into trouble in the wild and just wild enough to get into trouble in the home, a cat conundrum paraphrased from a friend. Currently residing with a pair of ferals has really brought this home to me, literally. Dogs were domesticated by hunter-gatherers thousands of years before cats and humans began their complex alliance. Cats were most likely domesticated by farmers long ago who needed to keep their grain free of vermin. Genetic studies reveal that all domestic cats trace their roots to the Near Eastern wild cat, making the Near East one site of domestication as well as a cradle of agriculture and Egyptian paintings from roughly 4,000 years ago clearly show people caring for cats. Researchers have now found eight cat bones in the garbage pits of Quanhucan, a farming village in central China, and two of the bones are more than 5,000 years old. Apparently cats were on the job even earlier than once thought. The two that have taken up residence with me are on the job at daybreak daily leaping up onto my bed to attack the mice under the blankets that in actuality are my feet. 

Another Reason to Just Say No

Laws legalizing the use of marijuana for medical purposes or just plain old personal use are gaining momentum. Like nicotine in cigarettes and alcohol in adult beverages the stuff in marijuana may become just another drug one can choose to use or abuse like cigarettes and alcohol. I get all the reasons for legalization and regulation so there is no argument from me here. I am just writing this because if it is inevitable that this drug becomes legally available there will still continue to be valid reasons to just say no. I could ask the question here about whether or not you know or knew anyone whose lives have been negatively affected by legal drugs like cigarettes and alcohol. Maybe you don’t know anyone that has suffered from the ill effects of drinking and smoking with alcoholism or lung cancer, but what about the other side of the coin, a family or friend devastated by a death or injury resulting from DUI? If any of your answers are similar to mine then these problems with legal drugs may hit pretty close to home.

I recently read about a study that linked the usage of marijuana to the onset of schizophrenia, a serious form of mental illness that’s onset is often seen one’s teens or early 20s, and memory disorders. This study involved nearly 100 teens between ages 16 and 17 who were split into four groups: those who had used marijuana in the past, those who had not, schizophrenia patients who had never used marijuana, and schizophrenia patients who had. The participants reported not abusing any drugs other than marijuana. Researchers performed MRI scans on the participants' brains and compared various anatomical structures; the healthy former marijuana smokers and the schizophrenic participants who had smoked marijuana both showed shrinkage of regions in the brain connected with working memory compared to the healthy and schizophrenic teens who had not used marijuana. Next the researchers tested the participants and found that the shrinkage had real effects; when the participants took memory tests, the healthy volunteers who never used marijuana scored 37 times higher on average than those who had smoked pot, and the schizophrenic patients who hadn't used marijuana scored four times higher than their schizophrenic counterparts who had.

These results are especially troubling for youth with mental health issues, or that may be at greater risk of them and to me are another reason to just say no.

Nathan Bedford Forrest, What’s in a Name?

Nathan B. Forrest, noted confederate of the Civil War era, first Grand Wizard of the KKK, and soon to be former namesake of a high school in Jacksonville, Florida is what’s in a name today. Enough about what color Santa is or should be already, changing the name of this school that now has a predominantly black student body is a more valid conversation starter on questions of race today. The push to change the school’s name is not new to the news and although the community input was for keeping the Nathan B. Forrest name the students’ votes called for change. School Board Member, Ashley Smith Juarez said, “My vote tonight does not reflect judgment of a man I am not called to judge. My vote tonight honors the voice of students." The Duval County School Board unanimously voted to change the name of Nathan B. Forrest High School Monday and Duval Superintendent Nikolai Vitti wants the students to decide on a new name. The name will be officially changed in July 2014. Hooray for the students! May their victory be a step toward a kinder more tolerant world. 

Hot Sauce as a Deterrent

Recently I read about a teacher accused of feeding hot sauce laced crayons to an autistic student. I have mixed feelings about this. Let me explain, I don’t think hot sauce works very well as a deterrent because I’m pretty sure there used to be a product that you put on the fingernails that was supposed to help break the nail biting habit. It painted on and dried clear and I tried it on one of my sons (Neil, I wonder if you remember this) when he was little. It didn’t work and I actually think he liked it. Of course hot sauce is hotter these days too. I like a little hot sauce but some people take the whole hot sauce making business to the extreme, I’m thinking of Kiss your Ass Goodbye Hot Sauce or Kick Ass Hot Sauce, which is touted as not your grannie’s hot sauce and in my case not this grannie’s either. Butt back to the crayons, from my experience no matter the color all crayons taste pretty much the same and as a teacher I would definitely try to discourage my students from eating them, just not by dipping or soaking them in hot sauce. I don’t think the teacher I read about cut the crayons up and put them on a lunch tray to feed to her student, more likely she was trying to deter him from chewing and eating crayons during the daily classroom routine. I have a feeling that the habit of eating school supplies might have had a more complicated origin that would not be an easy fix, and add to that the child’s autism makes me think that regular social interaction, just saying no, wouldn't work either. Another memory that I know my daughters remember clearly involved ornamental peppers that their brothers had picked and told them to rub on their lips like lipstick. The reaction was horrible and included crying, lip burning and swelling, and uncontrollable nose running. The cure for the girls only included ice cream, mean brothers excluded. My girls, though not autistic, didn’t think twice about doing as their brothers suggested. I relate this because I figure the child that tasted or ate the hot sauce laced crayon probably felt significant discomfort and that isn't what school should be about for any child autistic or not. Schools (I mean all faculty, staff, and admin) work hard to be safe places and putting hot sauce on crayons as a deterrent to eating them was certainly not professional. The reason for my mixed feelings? The teacher got her a job back, just not in the same capacity with students.

Drawn by the Tides

I’m not sure what it is about the ocean that as a topic and in my life in general I find myself drawn to, it just is and I just am, I guess. Maybe it has something to do with being raised in the Midwest (Chicago) so far from its influence, or that fact that my whole family now lives near or surrounded by it, oceans and gulf, I’m not sure. Then there’s the whole tornado in December thing that got me thinking of how storms (hurricanes) at sea stir up the ocean and feed the fish so much so that they are commonly referred to as fish storms, I blogged about that back in September. And now I've discovered that ships actually fertilize the ocean. Soot from oil burning ships dump lots of soluble iron back and forth across 3 million miles of ocean and this iron has a way of sucking the carbon dioxide from the air into the ocean possibly causing plankton blooms. Some scientists in Japan found that the iron from aerosol emissions mostly sinks to the bottom of the sea without much effect on ocean life but the iron in shipping soot is 80% soluble and is likely to be fertilizing the ocean and has been for quite some time. What does this mean? Scientists aren't sure because it isn't scientifically feasible to test whether or not the fertilizing is harmful to ecosystems or beneficial for carbon uptake. It’s just another uncertainty in the sea of uncertainties that surround me.

Fighting for a Place in the Olympics and a Get Out of Jail Free Card

Lately I have been hearing and seeing more commercials touting February’s upcoming winter Olympic Games. That and I have been walking myself and a dog or two with a good friend who just happened to mention to me that in Thailand prison inmates can get out of jail free if they are good enough to make that country’s Olympic boxing team. And I thought, Wow, from hardened criminal to national Olympics hero that really is something to blog about! Then I started thinking about all those prison movies where the prisoners become amazing athletes. And then I took that thought one step further and thought about how so many amazing athletes throw their careers away and end up in prison. So I figured I’d go ahead and look into the get out of jail free business in Thailand and I found out that prisoners really are vying for places in the Olympic Boxing arena and have been since 2009. I also discovered that boxing isn't one of the winter Olympic sports so I won’t see them doing that in February, but that’s okay because the winter sports are always interesting to me. I guess I just love seeing that snow and knowing I don’t have to drive in it.

Time Person of the Year

Pope Francis is this years’ Time Person of the Year and I think his photo on the cover is a nice one. The Catholic Church has taken a bunch of hits in recent times because of the flaws of man. The criticisms deserved but the message of love as we near the season in which we remember the birth of Jesus is on the rebound with this new leadership, I hope. The fact that he was chosen under the unusual and nearly unheard of circumstances of a current Pope retiring (without the benefit of death as has been the norm) was surprising and his simpler approach to shepherding his flock refreshing. But no matter your faith, as long as you have faith we all have common ground upon which to stand and work to rebuild our broken world through good choices grounded in that all important concept of love.   

And on another note, I am so glad he beat out Edward Snowden and Miley Cyrus.  

Woman Becomes Unglued..in Home Depot

While checking out strange and unusual news I came across a segment that included a clip from the home made phone video of a woman becoming unglued from a toilet seat in Home Depot. Someone covered the seats with an adhesive called Loctite and when she sat down it did just that. The video clip showed several store employees going in and out of the stall and the paramedics too. I even got a glimpse of the poor woman in situ with a paper gown or paper of some sort covering her lap. The video background was not music but rather the cries of this poor woman as her hide was literally peeled off and left on the seat and back of the commode. The paramedics purportedly used WD40 so loosen the adhesive. The news person said that the woman’s family thought they should have taken her to the hospital with the commode seat attached and figured out how to remove it there rather than in the Home Depot restroom. He also said police were looking at surveillance video but had no leads at this time. The final segment of the story showed the victim on her sofa where she has been recuperating since Thanksgiving and she says, and I’m paraphrasing here, in the end it wasn't funny. I just hope the rest of the home video doesn't turn up on You Tube.

Dollar General’s Secret to Success

Dollar General’s secret to success is cigarette sales and that is disappointing to me. We have a Dollar General near my home in St. Marys and it has been doing well. I see cars in its parking lot at all times of day and night and have stood in line at the register many times, not as long a line as there is in Walmart but a line just the same. This particular Dollar General is close enough to have caused me to put my blinker on a block too early for my turn off from the main drag here on my way home. I like how the cashiers always ask about donating my change to a Literacy charity or more recently St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital. I like to think of the Dollar General as a bit more upscale than the Flash Foods and other convenience types with gas pumps included. The Dollar General also has a sales flyer and I like getting a good deal as much as anyone else. But now that I read they are upping their profit selling cigarettes I feel sad because I am going to lose the convenience of stopping by there for last minute things and things I've inadvertently left off my regular shopping list. Cigarettes have harmed so many of the people I've known, loved, and even despised. Smoking is so harmful and I can choose not to support it, even though I know addiction is complicated, by going down the road a little further to the Dollar Tree.

The Merry Christmas Law

Texas has one, a so called Merry Christmas law that allows students and teachers in schools throughout the state to dress in festive garb and say "Merry Christmas" all they want without fear of punishment. It’s backed by social conservatives who feel that seasonal religious festivities have come under attack because of political correctness. It also covers the Jewish celebration of Hanukkah, which ended earlier this month. This law doesn't cover the festivities of religions, like Islam or Buddhism, but students that feel censored can seek support under this law too. Christmas trees and nativity scenes are in as long as they do not include a "message that encourages adherence to a particular religion's belief." I don’t usually find myself standing with the social conservatives but in this instance the only comment I can make is to simply say, “Merry Christmas” even if I’m not in Texas. I like the Merry Christmas Law and hope it catches on everywhere.

Potcake Update

She’s a sock stealer and a chewer, and contrary to what was advertised, she is not yet potty trained. She wandered on to the base (AUTEC) on Andros Island, Bahamas and went from under a trailer, to a dog lover and rescuer, and finally to our family. This potcake (a no longer feral dog of the Bahamas) is named Sailor and there’s just something endearing about that little brown nose and those brown eyes. I will be meeting her later this week and look forward to chronicling her future adventures. And now when I hear my husband has been down on the floor it won’t be because one of those I've fallen and I can’t get up moments. He’s just been down on the floor playing with a potcake.

Microsoft’s Secret?

It’s not so secret anymore. Microsoft researchers have created a smart bra, as if there weren't enough smart things out there already. Seriously, I wonder if anyone else considers the possibility that wearing one of these could be an invasion of my privacy. The smart bra supposedly can alert you if you are spending too much time at the fridge, among other things. I wonder how long it would be before it puts that info out on Face Book for the rest of the connected world to see? I for one don’t need or want my bra to tell me or anyone else how many trips I make to the fridge! I need a bra for support (literally!), not discouragement! There are already things that go on your arm to measure your heart rate and how many steps you take or calories you burn. Speaking of burn, I also think it might be time to burn those smart bras. It’s not likely that I’d buy one anyway but if I did that’s what I’d do! And yep, I am in my sixties and bra burning is kind of a sixties thing, so it makes sense to me.

Contronyms

I guess I’d best admit it right up front, contronyms was the title of a Jeopardy category. As a teacher I’d heard of a bunch of nyms, including but not limited to synonyms (words that mean the same thing like lukewarm and tepid), antonyms (words with opposite meanings like hot and cold), and homonyms (words that sound the same but have entirely different meanings like blew and blue). I guess the main thing to notice here is that the nyms all have something to do with words and their meanings and the same is true of contronyms. Contronyms are words with two meanings, and these two meanings are the opposites of each other, like left, which can mean left as in gone (think Elvis has left the building) and left as not all gone (think there is one cookie left in the cookie jar). Another favorite of mine is off, because off can mean off or on like in the following. He turned the lights off (off as in off). When the window broke, the alarm went off (off as in on).

Being in St. Pete in December is almost like a contronym. 80 degrees and I’m going to a t-ball game tomorrow. Now I just need a word for this happiness with no contradicting meaning, I’m just happy.

PLEX ID, the Universal Biosensor

This device sounds like something out of Star Trek and it takes the guesswork out of identifying all bacteria, viruses, and fungi known to cause infectious diseases in people. Unlike Dr. McCoy’s sensor in Star Trek, the PLEX ID takes 5 hours to determine most results and some particularly tricky pathogens can take even longer. The PLEX ID isn't small either like Dr. McCoy’s handheld, though I have a feeling it will be in the future as most technology has gotten smaller and smaller. The advantage of using the PLEX ID is that instead of possibly taking ineffective drugs due to a diagnosis based on visible evidence and guess work, with an accurate diagnosis your medications can be streamlined for maximum effectiveness in shutting down whatever pathogen is making you sick. The PLEX ID works by determining the DNA of the microbe rather than growing a culture in a dish to identify it by shape or other characteristics. The PLEX ID has been used in research for some time now with its original purpose being to identify potential biological warfare agents. Once again technology with military beginnings can perform a greater good in the civilian sector. 

Chocolate Covered… Potato Chips!

This is just the thing I don’t need to be even thinking about between the two biggest eating holidays on my calendar, Thanksgiving and Christmas. Unfortunately though they are now on my mind since I saw this comment on Face Book-You don't realize how many chips are in a bag until you start making chocolate covered potato chips and then you're like: "damn, this is going, to take all day". My answer would be to eat some chips before, during, and after the chocolate runs out and then it wouldn't take all day! And next of course my mind would drift to thoughts of other more conventional chocolate covered treats, like pretzels and cherries, but these chocolate covered potato chips give a newer, tastier meaning altogether to the new image conjured up in my mind by the words I’m saying with reverence (and imagine a little music in the background too)…chocolate chips. Just close your eyes try to picture the chocolate covered potato chips arranged on a sparkling cut crystal platter with the rays of the sun highlighting a glorious sunrise in the background and you’ll get the idea. Then think of the sweet and salty rush when you bite into that first chocolate chip, and yep, you may have guessed this, I bet I can’t eat just one.  

Well, I’ll Be a Monkey’s Uncle!

A chimpanzee named Tommy could be the first nonhuman person recognized by law if the Boston-based Nonhuman Rights Project (NhRP) gets their way. This group wants Tommy released from a small, dank, cement cage in a cavernous dark shed in Gloversville, N.Y. where he now is kept and I do too. Animals today have some protection from abuse and thus cannot be beaten or deprived of food, shelter or medical care, but they are still legally considered property. Tommy now has a lawyer and trust fund and his advocates want him transferred to the North American Private Sanctuary Alliance in Wauchula, Fla. Founded in 1993, the 120-acre facility houses 45 great apes, many of them former research animals, or maybe in the near future, persons depending on your point of view. I keep thinking of the chimpanzee in the news a while back that was raised by a family of humans but turned on them causing great bodily harm. The sanctuary might be a better place for Tommy, person or not, and the persons of the human variety he will come in contact with.

New York statutory and common law do not limit legal personhood to Homo sapiens (aka humans) and have already conferred legal personhood status on non-human domestic animals who are the beneficiaries of trusts and courts also have routinely extended rights to non-human entities such as corporations. The most important cognitive ability is autonomy, according to NhRP, and Tommy has it along with humans and other great apes. This along with other traits constitutes what makes a person, or in this case, a chimpanzee, a person.

All I can think is, “Wow, maybe I could be a monkey’s uncle aunt!”

Car Hacking through Networked Car Computers

Quite a few blogs back I wrote about how our privacy can be hacked by wireless electric meters, but I didn’t even consider the possibility of car hacking. But apparently car hacking can be done.  May it never be as common as carjacking but it shares some characteristics. The driver isn't in control of their own vehicle and the consequences could be deadly. Car cyberattacks where cars are controlled remotely and made to accelerate wildly or brake suddenly are possible, just not proven, yet. The engine control unit, the ECU, in your car controls the engine power, transmission, and brakes and mechanics plug in with a laptop to diagnose problems. Remote diagnostics go over a cellular network like OnStar. These can make your car vulnerable. A couple of Spanish engineers have created a device ($25) with a $1 chip that breaks encryption so users can write to the memory of a car’s ECU in order to get more horsepower out of a car or get it to burn less fuel. Until as recently as five years ago cars ECU systems have gone unencrypted. Computers are a big part of lots things I take for granted and now I have one more to think about. Could my car be used as a drone?

Discarded DNA

An artist, Heather Dewey-Hagborg, collected detritus from the streets of New York City and with the DNA from the items reconstructed the owner’s faces. Her sculptures used genetic markers for eye color, hair color, racial ancestry, and facial structure. The predictions provided by the discarded DNA were not enough to cause the sculpture to closely resemble the original owners of the DNA but they did make me wonder about genetic surveillance and consent. The artist just assumed there were no laws governing abandoned DNA materials in public places, like ashtrays and public trash receptacles, and even the city streets. The U.S. does have a patch work of genetic privacy laws, but none written to address the testing of abandoned DNA. Interesting, I think. Dewey-Hagborg argued that her project doesn't infringe on the privacy of the DNA donors because they are unlikely to be recognized from the sculptures. If nothing else, this might make some think twice about being litter bugs.

How to Eat a Cupcake, with Frosting in Every Bite!

It’s the day after Thanksgiving, leftover day at this house and probably plenty of others, and I want to share something I learned (and am thankful for also) at our Thanksgiving meal yesterday, how to eat a cupcake with frosting in every bite. I guess it’s a good thing there’s a cupcake leftover for the photo. I must give credit to one of our dinner guests, Ashley, for this ingenious cupcake eating method and let her know that her technique has taken off like wildfire, well maybe not exactly wildfire but taken off nevertheless, among my grandchildren, several of whom will (like me) never eat a cupcake the old way again. The steps are pretty simple. First look over the entire tray of cupcakes for the one with the most frosting, if you are a frosting fanatic or an adequate amount of frosting if you are not. Next, after choosing the cupcake, peel the cupcake paper off and discard. Then tear or cut the bottom half of the cake off and place it on top of the frosting to create a lovely little cupcake sandwich with the delectable frosting in the middle. After that all that’s left is to open wide to enjoy that first frosting filled bite and repeat until you have enjoyed eating all of your cupcake, yep, with frosting in every bite.

Happy Thanksgiving!

It’s a good day to count your blessings, I am counting mine, and thinking how important it is not to take them for granted. Happy Thanksgiving to you and your families from me and mine!
-Jo

Twas The Night Before Thanksgiving

Twas the night before Thanksgiving, when all through the house,

Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.

The turkey was thawing in the fridge with care,

For the next day’s feast and all who’d be there.

The potatoes were peeled, in the fridge, in a pot,

While they wait to be boiled, mashed, and served hot.

With Poppa away, and I in my bed,

Thanksgiving’s menu kept cycling through my head.

When out in the front room came a bark from our pup,

I sprang from my bed to see what was up.

Down the dark hallway to the window to peek,

I pulled back the drape to see what made the dog speak.

Clouds hid the moon, grey fog shrouded the night,

Fallen leaf clutter camouflaged the dog’s fright.

I remembered once marshmallows dotted the leaves like snow,

The marshmallow gun Christmas, a few years ago.

Grandkids, cousins, uncles, aunts, all had fun,

Hiding all around in hopes of ambushing someone.

Thinking of the early start for cooking I would need,

I let go the drape, back to bed to proceed.

The holiday season tomorrow would begin,

With family, friends, all loved ones stopping by and dropping in.

I bowed my head to give my thanks for all of it in advance,

Knowing this quiet moment might be my only chance.

And as dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,

When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky.

Came a thought of marshmallows for the sweet potato soufflé,

That’s what I’d forgotten and would need the next day!

Then I thought of future blessings and remembered the past,

And my Mom’s sweet potatoes, no marshmallows, yet eaten just as fast.

So I slipped back into my bed, by now I was yawning,

And wondering what new memories would begin with Thanksgiving’s dawning. 

I’m Thankful

Two more busy days until Thanksgiving and then the holidays will really be upon us. To me it feels like the rush has begun early like Black Friday coming a day early this year. So before I start peeling the potatoes I’m taking some time to reflect on the things I am thankful for, including the potatoes and the rest of the things that nourish our families physically, not just on turkey day, but all year long. I am also thankful for grandchildren because they create their own special niches in the hearts of their grandparents. Ours are growing up and I marvel at the way they impact this world and how well they have made it their own. Somehow they are managing to navigate through the same stages as their parents, yet in much more interesting and, unlike their parents (my adult children), less exasperating ways. It’s interesting to watch their parents now too and how everything that comes around goes around again. Though I once warned that they would deserve to have kids that were just like them and I meant put them through the things that made me want to pull my hair out, I am thankful to see that their kids, my grandkids, are growing up resilient with the best of their parents’ character reflected in their personalities. I am thankful.